wow what a whirlwind summer. I haven't blogged since the last part of April. Sorry bout that, but not really. I have had a lot I could blog about but I've chosen to skip out. Although I could have posted something almost every week of camp.
For those of you that actually read this and/or keep up with me. I have been working for FUGE Camps this summer. Summer number five!! What keeps me coming back?! It's probably because I've seen the Lord work in so many ways through my students, adults, fellow staffers and myself. The Lord has moved me to make bold choices and decisions that I would probably not have made if I hadn't worked camp. It seems like I'm more focused on God when I'm working camp.
But fortunately this whole year, since January I have been a lot more focused on God. Thanks to having a job fire me, attending Brentwood Baptist Church & Kairos, but also from camp. I have spent the last 7 months doing the best I can to bring glory to God and find my purpose in life.
I've told people that I feel like me moving to Nashville was the smartest thing I could have done for myself, mostly spiritually. Before I only attended church if I felt like getting up on time or if I was off. But now I find joy in going to church every week. Looking forward to seeing what the Lord will teach me through our pastor. Now I look forward to going to church during the middle of the week. Kairos has allowed me to go on Tuesday nights and grow closer to God. I LOVE it and I'm so grateful for a church like BBC that opens its doors and has such a great program.
But back to the summer...
It started off kinda rocky for me. I was not ready to see camp happen. Nothing was prepared by myself, I hadn't memorized my scripts like I should have, I was in a good mental state (I wasn't crazy). Just a lot of things happened before camp. I moved out of the house I was co-renting with two guys; working 40 hour weeks and such. I had a LOT going on. But really there's no excuse for sorriness and there is no excuse for mew not being prepared for camp other than on my days off and time off i was completely lazy.
I packed up my life, for the 3rd time in a year to move it yet again. Fortunately I was able to move all of my stuff to my parents house (where it still is sitting...long story). But I am happy they were willing to open their doors/basement to store my stuff. I'm OK with the move, again. I had no clue where I was going to live after camp, and still don't... again long story). So I have been living out of a suitcase for the last 3 months, almost.
Working at NEWKS before camp was a roller coaster. Some days I hated it, most days; then there were days that I liked it. It got better about 3 weeks before camp when they started firing the crap employees that worked there and/or people started quitting. Fortunately they wanted me to come back after camp. So that was good, I can't say awesome but it was good that I had another job that would allow me to leave for 10 weeks and then return like I hadn't even been gone. Five years of camp and every year I've been able to return to my job. God has definitely blessed me in that! I did return this week after being gone for 10 weeks. It was a little odd but I jumped right back in like I hadn't been gone at all.
But yea so I got to go to Florida for a weekend of acting training. That was a lot of fun for sure. Getting paid to be on the beach was a definite plus side. Not like I saw the beach much but it was nice to get away for a day or five.
I left for camp, moving all of my stuff to my parents house. It took a 12x6 ft trailer and the back of my truck was full, but I got it all there. I packed it by myself, but I'm glad I didn't have to unpack it by myself. That was awful. Then off to camp I went.
I served in Williamsburg, KY with M-FUGE. I got moved on March 6 to Williamsburg after having planned to spend my summer working Centrifuge at Panama City Beach. So I'll be honest I was a little disappointed but I knew that God moved me for a reason so I'm not overly upset, bitter a little haha. But I got to serve 6 weeks of camp in Williamsburg working with teens and adults.
It was definitely the most different summer I have worked. I can't dive into too many details because there are somethings that happened that I'm not supposed to know about, but I do. There are some things I don't want to mention to protect the innocent and the guilty. Want to know more, if you read my blog you can text/call me... I'll tell ya.
But God taught me a lot about patience this summer and what it means to be a mentor. Having so many new people on our staff was a blessing and a curse. It made the summer different in so many ways. Always being asked questions by the newbies challenged me to look at camp in a different way. It almost made me feel like I was working camp for the first time, again. It was nice to be looked up to. The newer staffers looked to me as an example, which intimidated me a little bit. I'm not a good example sometimes. I can be disruptive, cut up or giggle at all the wrong moments, but I know that God put me there to prepare me for greater things.
My track groups (my students/adults that I worked with) somehow always seemed to be a lot of younger students. It's not that I hate middle schoolers but they are a struggle to work with some times, but then I had two really awesome weeks. Week 4 and week 5 I had great students, a lot of older kids, students who were willing to talk during bible study, participate during track time and were generally excited about camp and all that comes with it. I was convinced one of those weeks that I actually had a shot to win MEGA Relay (our end of the week activity that's just a lot of fun), but I didn't. It's OK though we had fun either way.
When we were on our last week of camp it didn't feel like the last week. It felt like we should have had at least 1 more week. I had a really rough week. Mostly because of me, but I had a weird group of students and adults. They were all physically young/young Christians. It really challenged me to reach these students. It was a rough week all around for me. I was little bitter knowing that this was our last week but also I had no idea what was going to happen after camp so I became preoccupied with life outside of camp and what that was going to look like. I did get to see one of my students become a Christ follower so that was exciting for sure! I know it's nothing that I did but to know that I had a part in helping him along made it feel cool.
Now that camp has come and gone and we've been away from camp for almost 3 weeks, really... three weeks? yup. Camp ended so quickly and there's days I look back and say... "wait I worked camp?"... but I know that the Lord worked in and through my staff and myself. Sure I felt down trodden a lot and I wasn't always sure I was making a difference, but it's not about me, but about God. His work was done and that's all that matters. Students and site kids came to know the Lord. Lives were changed, people were called to vocational ministry and a lot of other cool stuff happened!
But now what? What's up with me? I don't have a single clue. No really. I just got back to Nashville this last week, and fortunately have been able to stay with friends this week, but what do I do after that? I have no clue. I was able to go back and work for NEWKS and starting Tuesday I'll be working for the CAGE at Lifeway. It's where all the camp stuff that gets returned to our corporate office. We will be unpacking and reorganizing all of the stuff from 14/15 different locations as well as all the stuff from centri-kid. It's going to be an interesting two weeks... especially because I have no clue where I'll be sleeping at night. Like for real. It's making me nervous. I can't afford a hotel and I can't afford anything over the next few weeks. Food's a different story, but it's the housing I have to figure out.
But after the cage I'm not really sure what's going to happen. As of now I plan on going back home to my parents house and staying with them for the next few months while i get back on my feet and save some money. Even if I stay through the end of the year I can always move back to Nashville. I love it here, but when you have nowhere to live it's hard to live here. Just a thought. Sure it will suck living with my parents at 28 years old, but sometimes you have to do what you have to do. There's no sense in beating around the bush... it sucks but I feel like God is all over this and He's making sure I know that it's the right thing. I'll miss going to church at Brentwood, but the cool thing is at least I can download the podcast and keep up with Kairos through that.
I'm asking for prayer friends. I have no clue what's going to happen over the next two weeks, let alone the next 6 months. It's going to prove to be an interested time in my life I know that for sure.
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